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The Community part 1 – Fake it till you make it

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Over the next few weeks i will be writing some articles about the dissociative identity disorder community and how we can grow and progress as a community.  because i’ve been noticing some things within the DID community that make me..
a bit uncomfortable. Video at the end!

grey metal hammer
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Community:

Now first of all i’m not talking about anyone specific nor am i talking about AlterNation or any of my other groups specifically, nor am i talking about my own personal experiences the past few weeks, but let’s be realistic of course it plays a part.
I think/feel there is a lot of judgement going around.
High functioning systems is the norm these days it seems.
Or what we should all be striving for.

But personally i think before we can even attempt that, we will have to deal with the judgements taking place within our community. I believe these judgements are based in people’s fears. Let me first say that we are the community, we make the community, we build the community and hopefully we don’t break the community (any further.)

Calling people fake

My groups are extremely strict about NOT calling people fake. We are not allowed to diagnose, nor are we allowed to dismiss someone’s diagnosis or tell them for sure they don’t have DID based on a fb profile or a youtube channel. It is not okay to say that because someone has a certain faith or religion or cultural background that they don’t have or can’t have DID or that they are faking DID.
Its not okay to say someone does not have DID because they use a different terminology or explanation of their symptomes.

If I say i dissociated all day, that could mean like 10 different things, to 10 different people. DID is not faked anymore then any other disorder. If we truly look at this statement, that is only a statistic from how many people sought help for (faking) DID or obviously making it up in a court case or w/e. On the internet, anyone can be anything. It’s also referred to as catfishing or identity theft, if you take it a step too far. Its not the same as faking a (DID) disorder. So yes, i do agree that their might be people online who are acting.

I also think there are people who think they are faking but are not. And if we continue with dismissings peoples own truths about their past, trauma, life or emotions and experiences, if we keep dismissings peoples individual truths, this community ain’t going to get more pretty.

cobblestones saying dream, courage, inspire, harmony. - Community
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com cobblestones saying dream, courage, inspire, harmony. – Community

DID is not rare

We see hashtag #1in5 about mental health. Hear statistics like 1-3% of the world population has DID that’s more than bolumia. We hear 1 in 100 has DID/dissociative disorder. But this is all based on correctly diagnosed people. As you might know the statistics sadly also explain it takes 6-8 years to get a correct diagnosis. PTSD is misdiagnosed 50% of the time, the first time. And then we have our shame, guilt and fears, we might not be honest with professionals.

What i am trying to say is, the number 1-3% is prob an under calculation. Because if we would all get correctly diagnosed right away, when there is no or way less stigma and fear, if professionals where actually educated on the topic, if there was actual help out there for the majority instead of the few lucky ones, those numbers would rise a lot. And i hope i will live to see the day the truth comes out. If you think someone is faking, try to make the best assumption about this (stranger you don’t know) person.

Something like maybe they act out so we will believe them. Maybe they worry they won’t be believed if they don’t have or talk about xyz. Maybe they really don’t remember trauma and wont just say they do have trauma while not remembering any of it. Maybe they think this is what you are supposed to do if you have DID because they see other people doing it. Maybe they fake it until they make it, until they can believe they actually do have DID and it was not just made up in their minds or head.

And for some people that can be a long process. A slow process. A baby step process. And i think, if we can, we should support them at every part of their journey. We are all at a different place on our healing path. We can learn so much from each other! And i truly believe, together we are stronger!

I hope, that next to the already existing resources, our facebook groups, our youtube channel, tumblr blogs and of course this website,  can be that community for everyone with dissociative disorders that wants help and receive and give support.
– Emely – Stronghold System – date: 19-07-2018

Video on community:

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About the authors

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The Stronghold System are the proud volunteer founders & CEO of The Plural Association Nonprofit. They are from the Netherlands and reside in a 30-something-year-old body, are nonbinary, parents of an amazing child & 3 cats. They got diagnosed with Dissociative Identity Disorder over 10 years ago & also self ID as Plural.

5 thoughts on “The Community part 1 – Fake it till you make it”

  1. Wauw mop. Blijf je volgen deel hem in mijn groep. Zodat mensen beter kunnen kijken en zien hoe het leven van ons er uitziet. Dat er meerdere bestaan herkenning etc.
    Respect voor jullie lieverds

    Liefs wen en co
    Translation:
    whow girl. I keep following you and will share this in my own group. So people can see and understand better what our life looks like. That we are not the only ones, being recognized etc.
    So much respect for you sweethearts

  2. It is so funny that you title this post as fake it till you make it .. I have said that to professionals under hypnosis when asked about malingering or not being believed .. ofcourse at that time I didn’t know about DID ..

  3. fantastic put up, very informative. I wonder why the opposite specialists of this sector don’t realize this. You must continue your writing. I am sure, you’ve a great readers’ base already!

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